The Physical Effects of Grief

 

Our human make up is comprised of interconnected systems and elements that are not limited to just our physical body. Our creator in His infinite wisdom has designed us as three-part beings; spirit, soul, and body. We were calculated to function most effectively when we are balance, but one defect or imbalance will throw us into a state of shock. That’s what happens when our life is affected by grief.

The Effects of Grief in the Mind and Body

Feelings of sadness and emotional breakdown takes a toll on our entire being. Our mental state will go through a myriad of issues because of the thought of living life without your loved one. Depending upon the circumstances surrounding the death we may be faced with feelings of sadness, depression, anger or guilt, and possibly fear. We may question whether we could have done more to prevent the loss. We are sometimes plagued with ruminating thoughts that may keep us up at night or give way to anxiety. Some may go through grief for an extended period of time. This is called complicated grief. This is a chronic reaction to grief that may bring thoughts of suicide. In this case it is imperative to seek counseling to process your feelings in a healthy and effective way.

Why Does This Hurt So Much?

 Going through this period of processing our emotions, our bodies are struggling to maintain balance as well. As a result, stress hormones are released by the body as a response to this imbalance.  Some examples of these stress related issues are:

Extreme Tiredness and Chronic Fatigue

Headaches

Digestive Issues

General Body Aches and Pains

Possible High Blood Pressure and Heart Issues

These symptoms can last for days or months, and sometimes people may go through these issues for years depending on their ability to cope. Therefore, we need to give ourselves permission, time, and space to grieve and mourn over loss. In my next post, How to Cope With Grief, One Day at a Time I will give you tools and ways to cope with your loss, that will bring about healing and the ability to move forward.

 

 

 

How to Cope with Grief One Day at a Time

 

You owe it to yourself to grieve in you own way. Give yourself permission to process your feelings and emotions. Keep in mind that it will take time, but during that time of transition be intentional about taking care of yourself. It does not dishonor your loved one’s memory when you choose to adjust your life in order to move forward. It will be difficult because you are heartbroken, but after a time of rest and self-examination, try to do one thing for yourself each day. These are some ways that will help to ease you back into a daily routine.

·         Make sure you eat right and supply your body with nourishment.

·         Spend time with other family members to talk about your memories and pain.

·         Take a walk and get fresh air when you can.

·         Meditation is beneficial to relax your body and mind.

·         Comfort yourself by looking through family albums or videos.

·         Seek out grief support groups to give a sense of nurturing and strength.

·         Rely on your faith to give you strength and healing.

 

You Don’t Always Have to Be the Strong One

To those of you who are always the pillar of strength and the “go to” person, it’s time to step back for a while and give the wheel to someone else. Take a stand for yourself and lovingly explain to your family and friends that you are having a difficult time and you need time to regroup. If they don’t understand, you may have to take drastic measures and take a short vacation to breathe and think. You can’t be there for others until you are there for yourself.

Help is Always Available for You

If you feel that you are having difficulty moving forward, having thoughts of suicide, or relying on substance abuse for comfort and coping, reach out for help with a counselor. They will aid you in exploring your feelings and help you to process through your grief.

 

 

 

 

Managing Life Through a Season of Grief

 

At some time in our lives, we will all experience some type of loss. In this post and in the ones to follow, we will be dealing with the loss of a loved one through bereavement. This loss leaves a void in our hearts and souls that cannot be prepared for.  Navigating life through the anguish of grief can be a very daunting ordeal that not only affects our mental and emotional state, but our physical well-being as well. It is the response that results from the trauma of that loss.

Seasons of grief will take us through periods of mourning, which is the outward manifestation of internal brokenness. The ebbs and flows of grief and mourning will range from sorrow, sadness, and guilt to possible anger and anxiousness. It can depend on the depth of the relationship and the circumstances surrounding their death.  Because grief is an individual experience, there is no certain way to grieve, and no set time frame.

The best way to deal with grief is to go through the process. Trying to ignore your feelings and pretending you’re okay will only prolong the process and cause your emotions to manifest in unusual ways and times, such as sudden outbursts.  It can also progress from sadness to depression if not dealt with. It can also take a toll on your physical state by raising your blood pressure. 

So, you see it is imperative that we go through the grieving and mourning in a healthful way. With time and being kind and gentle with yourself you will get through this.  Be mindful that as you heal, you will start to experience life in a new reality while cherishing your loved one’s memory. My hope and prayer for all of us is that we will give ourselves permission to feel and to heal as we move forward into the new normal of life.

 

 

What is Wholeness All About?

 

We human beings are made up of three parts: spirit, soul, and body. We are spirit, we possess a soul, and live in a physical body.  All these parts of ourselves are interrelated and function together as a whole. What affects one part of our being  will directly affect the other, whether in a positive or negative way.

Before I go into what wholeness means to me, let’s get into the definition of wholeness. Merriam Webster terms wholeness as the condition of being sound in body. The quality or state of being without restriction, exception or qualification. The Free Dictionary defines wholeness as containing all components, complete, not divided or disjoined. In the physical sense, it’s defined as not wounded, injured, or impaired; sound or unhurt. It’s also a state of having been restored, healed.

As you read through these definitions, what comes to your mind regarding wholeness? Does it seem to be an unattainable reality?

Well let me put your mind at ease. Wholeness has nothing to do with perfection. It’s a lifelong pursuit of balance in your spirit, soul, and body. It is bringing your whole self into balance and alignment through healing and restoration.

 

What Does Wholeness Mean to Me?

 

When I think of wholeness, a pie comes to mind. (Ok, so now you know I’m a fan of sweets…)  A pie is a whole unit, but it didn’t start out that way. From the crust to the filling, they all were separate ingredients. Once these ingredients go through a process of being measured, combined, and baked, these separate ingredients become one cohesive unit,  a delicious mouthwatering pie. That’s the process of becoming whole. It’s taking the fragmented areas of our lives through a progression of self-examination and personal growth in order to heal and become a better more vital you.

Before we can pursue wholeness with intention, we must acknowledge the truth about ourselves- the good, bad, and the ugly. Once you’ve begun to acknowledge the areas of your life that need to be improved, you will need to set daily goals and implement a daily strategy to achieve those goals. This can be developed through prayer, journaling, going through therapy, or talking to a trusted friend.

 Everyone is different and no one’s pursuit of healing to wholeness is the same. It is a work in progress for anyone who dares to break out of the norms of life and choose to approach life with a different mindset. It’s a matter of wanting to become your best self in order to live out your best life, not a perfect life, but your best life.